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| Me and my friend, Rachel, a couple summers ago (pictures of her and I together are very scarce) |
That wouldn't be a problem if these people were between the ages of 8-14 or 25-+. However, they're all people my age. Teenagers, ranging probs from about 15 to 18. Maybe 19. Probably not. And this is a problem. Why, you ask? Well even though I'm not all that socially-isolated thanks to the community in which I've grown up in, I am socially awkward when it comes to people my own age.
Growing up (since I was eight) I haven't really had friends my age. Not in a sense where I hung out with them with any regularity. So I never got comfortable with being with said people. So when I'm in a setting where I'm forced to be around them, naturally people will want to talk. I can get only so far before someone wants to say something to me. And then comes the awkardness.
I do a pretty good job hiding it, but I always feel it. Kids my age are naturally funny. Mostly because they all understand the same jokes, inside or not. It's because they've all grown up in a different society than me. School. Ah, school. The public school system. People will go out of highschool scarred for life due to what they experienced inside that building. However, on the way they learn how to be funny. I don't really know how, since I've never been through that, but it just seems to be a fact. So, when I don't get their jokes, I laugh anyways and pretend to know what the crap they're talking about. But on the inside I'm like "Uh.. you're an idiot". It does wonders for my popularity.
And then there's that wonderful point where, somehow, due to some inner psychic connection most teenagers seem to have, The Circle forms. I don't know why people find it necessary to do this, but when two people are having a conversation, shortly it becomes three people. Then for, then all of a sudden the person you were talking to is on the opposite end of a 15-person-long circle. You can no longer continue having that conversation, because everyone feels the need to be a part of it.
However (again), in more cases than not, I'm okay with this separation. It saves me from trying to come up with something to say to these people. Why is that so difficult, you may ask? Because I have nothing in common with teenagers! I don't care about the clothes I wear (brand-wise. I do put an abnormal about of thought into which pieces of clothes to wear with each other), or how my hair does or doesn't have enough volume (poofyness), or how glamorous my job is. Heck, I don't even know if that's what people my age talk about!
Actually, now that I think about it, the majority of conversations anyone my age has aren't really conversations at all. They don't care about what the other person has to say. The talks are actually all about past stories. Everyone has a story about something they did or something they know did. And then another person says "that reminds me of this..." and proceed to tell their own story that has nothing to do with the first story. And what I think happens more than it should: when a person is telling their story, no one actually listens; they're just thinking of their own story and waiting for the right time to jump in and tell it.
No wonder I can't communicate that well with teenagers. All my conversations happen with people who are 30 or over. Most adults are kinda past that phase of needing everyone to know every story that's ever happened to them.
Most adults.
I am very excited to see some people I haven't seen in, like, a year. And a very good friend of mine is gonna be there too, whom I haven't seen since the summer. I think he's gonna be moving here this summer though to work, so that's also exciting!
Wish me luck!
P.S. Sooo my hair didn't really turn black with a purple undertone. It's more like a rather bright reddish purple. Which is AWESOME and I'm thinking that when it get all my hair chopped off next month, I'll get it dyed this colour. It'll be sweet. It matches a pair of my favorite earrings. :)
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